Wednesday, December 3, 2008

4. Not Just Any Night

The night before Thanksgiving Anita Greeley, mother of Gina Lucas, was killed in a car accident. (Gina is the spouse of David Lucas, a local pastor appointed to the New Hampton/Martinsville/Mitchelville Charge.) Anita had celebrated her 50th birthday just a couple of years ago, and she was a very active participant in the lives of her children and grandchildren.
David’s mother died when he was young, and he has shared with me that Anita, his mother-in-law, quickly took him under her wing. When he made the decision to begin serving churches, she took him shopping and bought him four suits. She was a strong encourager for Gina. I know that the entire family is going to miss her immensely.
David sent me an email on Thanksgiving Day to tell me what had happened. Unfortunately, I turned off my computer on Wednesday evening and didn’t turn it back on until I returned to work on Monday morning. I celebrated the holiday with all the various family gatherings and did some charge conference business on Sunday without knowing of David and Gina’s loss.
Strangely, as I put on the coffee pot on Monday morning after arriving at the office, I had one of those “I shouldn’t have thought that thoughts.” It occurred to me that I was grateful to be working in a position where my schedule is more dependable, and I don’t get called out on emergencies on holidays anymore. Immediately, I knew that I shouldn’t have thought it. Sure enough, as soon as I opened my email, I discovered that I had almost missed the opportunity to offer a compassionate response to one of our clergy families.
However, David’s email, written back on Thanksgiving evening, told something more important. As it turns out, Anita was a member of Elmo United Methodist Church. Connie Eighmy, a lay minister assigned to the church, had gotten word about the accident and had already responded. I have received permission from David to share the following paragraph from his email to me:
“By the way the Pastor from Elmo came to the family home tonight and did a wonderful job!! I believe she helped to start the healing. As I write this e-mail I hear lots of talking in the house and some laughing. My wife is busy cooking in her Mother’s kitchen a Thanksgiving meal for her family. Her Mom would be proud of her. I know I am!”
Connie is in her first year as a lay minister. It could be considered a very part-time job. I imagine she had other things planned for Thanksgiving Day and the week-end that followed. I am sure there wasn’t time in her schedule to plan an additional service and sermon on Monday, call the right people in the church to be sure the family meal was covered, and get the building ready for the Sunday night visitation and Monday afternoon celebration of life service. But she did all that, and she did it well.
I don’t write this to give thanks to Connie for doing what other pastors wouldn’t. Rather, I write it because I know that almost every holiday one of our pastors gets such a call, and they respond just as Connie did. Pastoral responsibilities are unending, often untimely, and usually unrecognized. The tasks often require missing a family gathering and/or quietly wondering what to say in the eulogy while sitting at a family holiday celebration. After reading David’s email, I wrote this note to the other superintendents in Missouri : “Today, I am giving thanks for a very part-time lay minister who was willing to leave her Thanksgiving celebrations in order to be with a family in need. It probably happened in other places around the state. Pastors give up their holidays and give up time with family to do their jobs, and they do so without expecting anyone to notice. Then, they get the sermon ready for Sunday, drop by the visitation that evening, and prepare an additional service of worship for Monday while wondering what in the world to say to the darkness. I am humbled to be called their leader when it is clear they are the ones in the lead.”
Thank you, pastors, for the care and compassion you offer when most of the world is off celebrating. You truly bring light in the darkness. May it be that the next emergency call you get be one that takes you to the Bethlehem stable where the light shines for you.

2 comments:

Pastor Dean Eikenberry said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pastor Dean Eikenberry said...

A few years ago I had to conduct a service celebrating the life of a 21 year old son of a good friend of ours. At one point during the service I choked up and had to take a drink of water and wipe my own eyes before I could continue. Afterwards I offered my apologies to the young man's father. He told me not to worry about it that it just showed that I was human and really cared.

Steve, your posting has caused me to again show my humanity (I am still having difficulty seeing the screen clearly). I am truly humbled by the story of this lay minister; yet I can't think of a single clergy person who wouldn't do like wise. We truly are caring people, that's why we do what we do.